Yesterday I crashed Scoots McGee. It got stuck the that tricky gear between 1st and neutral. So I slid on the and hit my head! Good thing I was wearing the above helmet! Now I have a really stiff neck, and big black bruises up my side of my body. So I still had to go into work (trooper, or one who needs money) and while there I needed a laugh. I found this old email forward my brother sent to me. I laughed again at it and wanted to post it for everyone else to have a laugh. It's pretty funny!
1. While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.
2. The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.
3. Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on facebook people that I do know, but I deliberatelychoose not to be friends with?
4. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
5. Do you remember when you were a kid; playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in American did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There were no Internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.
6. There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
7. I think everyone has a movie that they love so much; it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that every one's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder earlier to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.
8. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
9. LOL has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say"
10. Whenever someone says, "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart."
11. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a slacker form cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
12. Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' example, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in.....ummm...Goonies"
13. I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water
14. Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning that just got a the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!
15. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVD's? I don't want to have to restart my collection.
16. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I wan to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I didn't make any changes to.
17. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.
18. I have being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. "I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it one? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?"
19. I like all the music on my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
20. It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.
21. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
